Allow your feelings
Cry, be angry, spend a day in bed – give the disappointment space instead of functioning right away. Feelings that are allowed to exist pass more easily.
When the test is negative.
You waited, you hoped, you may hardly have slept – and then there is only one line. This moment hurts, and it is allowed to hurt. On this page you will find what helps now, what happens next medically – and why a negative test is so often not the end of the story.
You are not alone
This moment is hard – and everything you feel is normal.
Grief, anger, emptiness, feelings of guilt, envy of pregnant friends – after a negative test, all of this can be there at once. None of it is exaggerated, and none of it makes you a bad person. You are grieving for something that matters to you infinitely. That deserves compassion – including your own.
And one more thing you should know: a negative test says nothing about whether you will become parents. Many of the couples we have accompanied since our early days as a fertility pioneer only hold their longed-for baby in their arms after the second or third attempt. The next step can wait until you are ready – but it is there.
First aid for the soul
What helps now.
There is no right or wrong way to grieve. These six things have helped many of our couples in the days after a negative test.
Time as a couple
Talk to each other – also about the fact that you may grieve differently. One of you needs words, the other distraction. Both are fine, as long as you know it of each other.
Distance from the testing routine
A few days without cycle apps, forums and temperature charts: consciously allow yourself breaks from everything that reminds you of the treatment – a day trip, exercise, a weekend just for the two of you.
Collect your questions
What have you always wanted to know? Write down every question that goes through your mind – it is the best preparation for the follow-up consultation with your doctor.
Book a follow-up consultation
A fixed appointment gives the carousel of thoughts an anchor: in the follow-up consultation we calmly analyse your cycle – and you do not have to decide anything until then.
Accept support
You do not have to go through this alone: our psychotherapeutic support has been a fixed part of our institute since 1988 – often a single conversation already brings noticeable relief.
The medical perspective
What happens next: your cycle tells us a lot.
As disappointing as a negative test is – for your treatment team, the past cycle is a valuable source of information. In the follow-up consultation we go through it with you step by step: how did your body respond to the stimulation? What did we learn in the laboratory about the eggs, fertilisation and embryo development? How was the uterine lining at the time of the transfer?
From these answers, your adjusted treatment plan takes shape: sometimes we only change details, sometimes we recommend additional diagnostics – for example in our in-house hormone and genetics laboratory – or a different treatment path. It is precisely this fine-tuning from cycle to cycle that is one of the reasons why the cumulative chance rises considerably over several attempts: 3 out of 4 women become pregnant with the Wunschbaby Method.
When thoughts wander further
If you are thinking about alternatives.
After a negative test, many couples ask themselves: how often do we want to try this? That question is allowed – and it has no expiry date. For some, the next attempt is the right path, often with an adjusted plan or a change of method, for example from insemination to IVF. Others first need a break of a few months. Both are good.
And some couples think about entirely different paths – such as adoption or foster parenthood. That is not failure either, but a path to family happiness in its own right. We have this conversation openly and without pressure too: at our institute, nobody decides over your head how your story continues. You set the pace and the direction – we make sure you have all the information along the way.
FAQ
After the negative test: your questions.
When is a new attempt possible?
Often sooner than many think: from a medical point of view, no long waiting period is usually necessary after a negative test – treatment can often continue in one of the next cycles. Just as important, however, is that you feel emotionally ready. You set the right time together with your doctor in the follow-up consultation – entirely at your own pace.
Why did it not work?
There is usually no single cause. Whether an embryo implants depends on many factors – most often, the development of the embryo itself plays a role, which is strongly influenced by chance and by the age of the eggs. Important to know: an unsuccessful attempt almost never means that you did something wrong. In the follow-up consultation we look at your cycle in detail and clarify whether additional examinations make sense.
Do our chances rise with the next attempt?
While the chance per attempt remains similar from cycle to cycle, the cumulative chance over several cycles rises considerably. In addition, every cycle gives us information with which we can adjust your treatment plan in a targeted way. 3 out of 4 women become pregnant with the Wunschbaby Method – many of them not on the first attempt. More on our success rates page.
How do I tell family and friends?
In whatever way feels right for you – you do not owe anyone a report. Many find a prepared sentence helpful, such as: “It did not work this time, we would rather not talk about it right now – we will let you know when there is news.” You may also say clearly what you need: distraction, a listening ear, or simply normality. And you are allowed to decline invitations that feel too heavy at the moment.
My partner grieves very differently from me – is that normal?
Yes, very much so. Often one partner shows their grief openly while the other switches into “functioning mode”, seeks distraction or wants to look ahead quickly. That does not mean he or she feels less. It helps to talk about exactly that: “This is how I grieve – what do you need?” If you feel you are talking past each other, a joint conversation with our psychotherapeutic support can resolve a great deal.
I feel envious of pregnant women – is that bad?
No. Envy and pain at the sight of baby bumps or pregnancy announcements are a completely normal protective reaction of your soul – they say nothing about whether you can be happy for others. You are allowed to skip baby showers and pause social media for as long as it makes you feel better. For the vast majority, these feelings pass again – especially when they are allowed to exist.
When should we seek professional support?
At the latest when the sadness persists for weeks, you withdraw strongly, sleep or everyday life suffer over a longer period – or when you simply feel you no longer know how to go on. Our psychotherapeutic support has been a fixed part of our institute since 1988 and knows the particular situation of fertility patients very well. In acute crises, the telephone counselling service (Telefonseelsorge) in Austria is there for you around the clock on 142.
You do not have to go through this alone
Psychotherapeutic support has been a fixed part of our institute since 1988 – because the wish for a child is never just medicine. Whether a single relieving conversation or support over several cycles: our team is there for you, alone or as a couple.
Your next step
We fulfil your wish for a child!
When you are ready, we analyse your cycle together and adjust your plan – at your pace, with a full hour of time for you.
Or call us: +43 1 877 77 75